A One Mann’s Movies review of “Dear Santa” (2024, 1*, 12).
I am always trying to enlarge my repertoire of ‘good’ Christmas film and this was on my BA flight back from the Antipodes. Sadly, this Jack Black offering from last year – Dear Santa – passed me by. I really didn’t miss much. For this is basically a one-joke film and I really struggle to understand what audience it was made for.
One Mann’s Movies Rating:
Plot:
Liam Turner (Robert Timothy Smith) is a young boy growing up in a fractious household where Mum Molly (Brianne Howey) and Dad Bill (Hayes MacArthur) are constantly arguing. He writes a heartfelt letter to Santa wishing for a better life for his family. But his dyslexia means that he addresses his letter to Satan instead of Santa. And Satan (Jack Black) never passes by the opportunity to snap up a soul by offering young Liam three wishes.
Certification:
UK: 12; US: R. (From the BBFC web site: “Moderate rude humour”.)
Talent:
Starring: Jack Black, Robert Timothy Smith, Brianne Howey, Hayes MacArthur, Jaden Carson Baker, Austin Post, P.J. Byrne, Kai Cech, Cate Freedman.
Directed by: Bobby Farrelly.
Written by: Ricky Blitt & Peter Farrelly. (From a story by Ricky Blitt, Peter Farrelly & Dan Ewen.)
Running Time: 1h 47m.
Summary:
Positives:
- The basic concept of the film has merit.
Negatives:
- The acting is dreadful.
- The jokes are crass and unfunny. In particular, Cancer is NOT funny.
- The ending is so utterly schmaltzy that I needed my air-sickness bag.
Full Review of “Dear Santa”:
A concept that made me want to watch the film.
OK, so the whole idea – black as it may be – of a dyslexic kid writing a Christmas letter to Satan instead of Santa is quite amusing. I’ll give them that. And who better to play a comedic Satan than Jack Black, who dials it to 11 as per his norm.
But then there is just very little funny behind it all.
Sadly, the concept is where the comedy ends. What follows is a fairly tawdry set of gags which, bizarrely, involve Liam (Robert Timothy Smith) needing to concoct a story about his friend Gibby (Jaden Carson Baker) having cancer….. FOR NO READILY APPARENT REASON!
Let me just state this to the Farrelly brothers, and other filmmakers, just for the avoidance of doubt…. CANCER IS NOT FUNNY GUYS. Not one bit. To have Liam plead with Gibby to “act more cancery” is utterly disgusting and made me want to turn off the film at that point (something I never try to do).
When Jack Black appears as Satan, dishing out three wishes (which doesn’t seem to be a known concept in any known multiverse), he brings with him a few jokes that generated a flicker of a smile. He stays in room 666 at the Redrum Motor Lodge (surely that should have been either 237 or 217?). Bit those smiles aside are too little and too late to save this Christmas turkey.
Mean and spiteful.
Elements of the subplot come over as mean and spiteful. Liam wants to bag the girl of his dreams Emma (Kai Cech) – where is all the stuff with genies and not being able to change free will? – and he succeeds in getting the girl, but then loses her again when he behaves like a cruel and heartless ass to his teacher Mr Charles (P.J. Byrne). You can’t even get any warm fuzzies out of a simple school romance.
I don’t mean to be rude, but….
Sadly, the quality of some of the child acting here makes you fully appreciate the quality of the early work of actors like Haley Joel Osment and Drew Barrymore. I’m afraid Robert Timothy Smith and Jaden Carson Baker both come over as wooden and forced. (I won’t hold the same criticism of Kai Cech who does much better as Emma.) I’m sure these guys will improve with more exposure, but I can’t pretend the work here was great.
The acting also creaks in most of the adult roles. Brianne Howey and Hayes MacArthur make you long for the likes of Rose Byrne and Seth MacFarlane in the roles. And P.J. Byrne as the acerbic teacher and Cate Freedman as an over-zealous crossing guard seem to be DESPERATELY trying to milk the low-quality material for laughs that are simply not there.
An ending so sickly that I felt diabetes was near.
No spoilers, but the final twist of the ending not only defies all the basic premises of time and space but also made me want to vomit it was so crass and schmaltzy. Nurse, the bucket.
So who was this for?
The film left me – and the Illustrious Mrs Movie Man, who started watching but bailed after 20 minutes – seriously wondering who it was made for. The film’s crass comedy earns it a 12 certificate from the BBFC and while I would normally let some of my sub-12 year-old older grandkids watch a 12, this is not one I will be pushing their way. But then older audiences will find it so childish and excruciating that, like me, they will probably be wanting to reach for the off button before the first hour is up.
Summary Thoughts:
A really dire Christmas offering, mean-spirited, largely unfunny and poorly acted throughout. Avoid!
Where to watch?
Trailer:
The trailer is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lE4dvz41Fgg.
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